The founder of Blazing Saddles is a 54 year old human female, who has 3 adult offspring, and 1 male slave. She is vigorously healthy thanks to many years of simulating sex acts to disco music in public places. Anyone who underestimates her deserves undisguised mockery and a boot to the patoot. She intends to advance from merely annoying to fully insufferable, and to go on being insufferable for at least forty more years, after which she may be persuaded to think about slowing down. After death, she demands to be cremated and to have her ashes flung into her enemy's eyes.

NAME: Laura Goodwin
LOCATION: Terra, North America, Connecticut


  1. Dinosaur neutering
  2. Bar-room clearing
  3. Rabble rousing
  4. Demon wrangling
  5. Angel wrestling
  6. Clanging her big, brass ovaries together really loudly
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